“Love is patient and kind. Love is not jealous or boastful or proud or rude. It does not demand its own way. It is not irritable, and it keeps no record of being wronged. It does not rejoice about injustice, but rejoices whenever the truth wins out. Love never gives up, never loses faith, is always hopeful, and endures through every circumstance.”
1 Corinthians 13:4-7
For many people this verse is very familiar. This is one of the many things the Bible says about love. 1 John 4:8 says “Dear friends, let us continue to love one another, for love comes from God. Anyone who loves is a child of God and knows God. But anyone who does not love does not know God, for God is love.” You could just substitute God for all those things and it would still be true. God is love is something that has been on my mind recently and that’s what I want to talk about.
Over the past few years I have only had a certain number of people I would call my closest friends and for the most part I didn’t get to see them all the time. After ending a relationship a few years ago the norm went from having someone there for me twenty-four seven, to my friends who I saw and talked to occasionally. They are amazing friends and really helped me through that time, but I got use to it being just me and my family. I didn’t have anywhere to go or anyone to regularly hang out with.
Needless to say coming to college was definitely a cultural shock in many ways. Sitting in a class room, having a teacher, being surrounded by people who weren’t related to you, and speaking to people you didn’t know. It was all so exhilarating and exciting!
Then you get into the swing of things and campus events become less frequent, people find their groups and clubs, and you don’t introduce yourself to as many people. It was at this time last semester I began to hang out with a great group of people, but I would see others and compare and I didn’t feel like I had friends who loved me or that I could love.
I don’t do well in loving people in a group setting and crave a one on one relationship and friendship with people. Last semester I fell into a funk where I looked to give and receive that love from someone who knew me, but felt like I couldn’t find that.
This semester I arrived with a confidence I just couldn’t put my finger on at the time. To be honest I hadn’t been spending time with God except for Sunday’s, I mean I would occasionally talk to Him during the day, but I wouldn’t take time to sit down and hear from Him or spend time in His presence. So, I was a little confused when I came back with this confidence and go get’em attitude. About a week ago the confidence crumbled and I reverted back to the scared, insecure girl, I had become years ago. It crumbled when I remembered that the thing I had been placing my confidence and identity in wasn’t perfect. Nothing is. Nothing, but God.
When my confidence crumbled I began to long for someone to be my rock, I tend to long for that in a guy. I just wanted someone I could love with all my heart and for them to love me back with all their heart. But this time is for me and God and so, there was no one to turn to. So, all I could do was ache and be depressed because “I had no one”.
As I was talking to a friend about all this, God showed me this cycle of events I had been living for months now and through the help of another friend I was encouraged to seek the only One I could love with all my heart and the only One who could give me the love I longed for.
Friday, February 3rd, I began to seek God again and spend time in His presence. Since then God has continued to bless me for seeking Him. Tonight (2.5.17) I saw a picture of one of my friends and thought “wow you’re so weird, but I’m so proud of you”. In that moment I realized that in just a few short months I have made some of the closest friends, who will be there for me whenever I need them and vice versa. BUT! It’s not until I spend time with Love, that I know how to love. It’s not until I place my identity in the solid Rock, that I will have a confidence truly like no other. It’s not until I take the first minutes out of my day and talk to my God, King, Creator, and Father, that I can be the child He created me to be.
Just A Thought From The King’s Daughter